Favourite Gigs of All Time

Not in any particular order. Subject to further editing and exaggeration as time goes by.

1. The Polyphonic Spree - Enmore Theatre, January 2005

2. Prince - Sydney Entertainment Centre, December 2003. My ultimate Prince concert comes true after almost 20 years. He played his 80s hits, including those from Purple Rain! Arrived at the venue to buy a ticket, and was approached by these two girls wanting to sell her dancefloor ticket! It was my lucky night. Now it would've been an even luckier night if it also meant her friend would keep me company before, during, and after the gig. Hoo-wah.

There were people onstage who apparently paid about A$1000 to watch his Princeliness up close, watching the gig from the back, near where the drummer was sitting or from the side, and turned into impromptu backup dancers.

Larry Johnson (bassist of Sly and the Family Stone) came onstage during one of his extended encores/jams. Apparently, they're both Jehovah's Witnesses.

3. Sleater-Kinney - Gaelic Club, December 2002 - It was the first time I heard "You're No Rock and Roll Fun", which is actually the funnest song with Rock and Roll in the title. Corrin is simply hot.

4. Lou Reed - Enmore Theatre, October 2003 - sure, he had his tai-chi instructor onstage, and you just had to stop from laughing cos it's LOU! They did an amazing Venus in Furs with a wild woman on the viola! And Anthony came on stage and sang Candy Says. Beat that, sucka.

5. Kylie Minogue - Sydney Entertainment Centre, 2002 - Fever tour - shiny, shiny, shiny. I just can't get Can't Get You Out Of My Head video out of my head. Actually, I can. I just think of the Spinning Around video, with the gold hot pants. Baby got back. She had robots and a UFO onstage!

6. Elvis Costello & Steve Nieve - Her Majesty's Theatre, 18 Feb 1999 - see review at http://www.general.uwa.edu.au/u/dpannell/music/ecrev3.htm

7. Nick Cave and the Bad Seeds - State Theatre, November 1997. Everyone has to hear Nick and the gang play The Mercy Seat. Maybe accompanied by shouts of "Death! Death! Death!" every few minutes. It's your patriotic duty, Aussies!

8. The Prodigy - Metro Theatre, (August?) 1997. At the end of the night I was wringing sweat out of my t-shirt. They were that good.

9. second Big Day Out - Sydney Showground, January 1993 - with Mudhoney, Sonic Youth, Nick Cave, Iggy Pop.

The ground was muddy from a little rain, so they had plywood boards for people to stand in the grandstand(?). It was still slippery though, so we rushed away from the mosh to avoid falling down and getting trampled during Mudhoney's set.

It wasn't the last act of the night, if my memory is right, but the highlight of the day was seeing all these people on the main stage playing "I Wanna Be Your Dog". Nick was running around on stage, carrying Iggy on his back!

Also memorable for the giant inflatable monkey set up near the main stage, with it's bare ass showing the words "Baby Got Back". I guess that was in lieu of Sir Mixx-a-Lot as headliner. Oh the possiblities!

10. first Big Day Out - Sydney Showground, January 1992 - with Beasts of Bourbon, Violent Femmes, Nirvana. I didn't know the words to Smells Like Teen Spirit, so I had to make them up while singing along with 10,000 people at the Hordern Pavillion. When the lights out, ini-tage-yash! Here we ornah, Ene-tay-shah! I feel stupid, and container! Here we ornah, Anastacia!

11. The White Stripes - Enmore Theatre, Oct 2003. Extremely memorable not just for the insane bluesy rawk action at the gig, but earlier in the evening, while we were at a Thai restaurant, Meg walked in with two friends, and sat at the table beside us!

I had my copy of SPIN with her and Jack on the cover, I had my silver pen, I had my Ixus camera in my bag. It was fate man, fate! I never buy SPIN anymore, but that morning I got a copy thinking, "Hey wouldn't it be cool if i hung out at the theatre exit and wait to get an autograph?" Maybe Jack can shake my hand and I'll be as good as he is on geetar. But I only took the magazine with me on the very very slim chance that I'd get to see them up close.

And there it was, staring me in the face. This was my chance. But I chickened out. I thought I'd be cool and not disturb them while eating.

Wuss. Loser. When did being nonchalant and acting like you don't care when you really OMG OMG OMG it's her it's her it's her love this fucking band so much it hurts. When did irony, not feeling, distancing, and all this post-moderny rubbish become "cool". Self denial is never cool! (yes, I'm Catholic) "Cool" is getting near Meg White, maybe touching her soft, alabaster skin as I shake her hand, or maybe give her a hug (it gets lonely in a band of two) and feeling her ample bosom touching my chest as I whisper a soft moan in her ear and she whispers back... err... or maybe just an autograph and a picture.